Theodore, AL— Lawrence Edward Lee, 45, after failing to receive any Christmas presents this year, decided to commit arson and set his trailer on fire. Not only is Lee present-less, but he is now homeless as well. Sheryl Matthews, Lee’s sister-in-law, advised reporters that she received and ominous warning from Lee who suggested his depression and that he planned to commit suicide by burning his home down. Matthews advised Lee’s other relatives of the situation immediately. Panicked relatives, attempting to stop the event from occurring, didn’t make it to the location on time. The trailer was already completely destroyed upon their arrival on the scene. A firefighter found Lee in the woods just behind the trailer, free from injuries and unharmed.
Lee tried to at first explain to arson investigators that he had fallen asleep with a lit cigarette, but the story didn’t wash. Lee was arrested and brought to the Metro Jail after being charged with resisting arrest, possession of paraphernalia, reckless endangerment, and public intoxication. William Clemons, Lee’s cousin, is pleased that he is still living, but angered by Lee’s actions. Clemons asserted his desire to slap his cousin for such ridiculous actions.
Filthy Lucre Plant Resources:
Andropogon virginicus L. var. virginicus
Eucalyptus platypus Hook. var. heterophylla Blakely
Douglasia nivalis Lindl. var. nivalis
Corymbia leichhardtii (F.M. Bailey) K.D. Hill & L.A.S. Johnson